let's fly
hit the sky line
of swirls and curls
of grass and wine
of beads, daisies, smokes,
of alcohol and jokes
of butterflies, your smile, my frown
whichever--stay, don't let me drown.
Monday, March 21, 2005
Friday, March 18, 2005
Monday, February 07, 2005
when you have nothing better to do
Step 1: Open your Winamp or other MP3 player.
Step 2: Put all of your music on random.
Step 3: Write down the first 25 songs it plays, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 4: Wait for complaints about the esoteric nature of your mp3s.
1. Slank - Terlalu Manis
One of Slank's best ones. Can't help thinking about a friend and her one moment in time ;p I personally don't have any sweet memory whatsoever nor anything more to say about this song. I just think it's that good for a local song.
2. Weezer - Keep Fishin' (demo)
Supernice. Just like other Weezer's songs. I love the video even more, with Kermit and Ms.Piggy and the rest of the gang. It's just the thought of you in love with someone else...
3. Coldplay - Moses
There are better days for these guys. But I do have one favorite line: "like moses had power over sea. so you've got a power over me."
4. The Cure - Cut Here (acoustic)
Good song, dunno what it's about. I also don't know the lyric. I just know the repetitive "I miss you" somewhere near the end, and the haw-inducing "if only is a wish too late". Interesting fact: Cut Here is an anagram for The Cure.
5. Travis - Writing to Reach You
I just listened to this song recently (I got these mp3 songs from Ebonk). Nice. Yeah, so-so. The common nature of Travis.
6. James Iha - No One's Gonna Hurt You
Also discovered this song just recently, but already, I love it. Sure, there might be a little lacking of creativity in the lyric dept, but it's nice to listen to it in the wee hours, when it's raining outside. My favorite.
7. Smashing Pumpkins - Today
Today is the greatest day I've ever known. Can't live for tomorrow, tomorrow's much too long. Dunno why it still reminds me of one of my unimportant "greatest days".
8. Pearl Jam - Better Man
One of the so-so good songs. However I loved this song so much back in elementary school...Or was it junior high?
9. Smashing Pumpkins - Farewell and Goodbye
I don't know this song. But it's slow and good enough for those merenung times. The title somehow intrigues me...So, I like it.
10. The Cure - Killing an Arab
I don't get the song and I don't like it either. And I know it's kinda racist, but the title cracks me up xD
11. Sixpence None the Richer - I Need Love
Time for guilty-pleasures-confession: I like some of their songs. Including this one. I even bought the soundtrack of the crappy Here on Earth to get this song.
12. Dewa 19 - Aku di Sini Untukmu
Like it. If you watch the video now, it'll definitely look crappy and cheap. But back in the days when I adored these guys, I enjoy watching the video. Tamara Blezinski looked great as always in it.
13. Radiohead - Let Down
A good song to listen to when I snuggle by myself beneath my blanket.
14. Weezer - o Girlfriend
It's okay. Reminds me of senior year and Oho. Random fact: I just found out that Weezer has a song called O Lisa? I definitely will make a song called O Slowdown ;D
15. Ben Folds Five - Bricks
I'm a sucker for this kind of song! The song that can make you go bengong and want to hug the pillow as tight as you can.
16. Third Eye Blind - Palm Reader
Although I claimed to be 3rd Eye Blind's fan, this is my 1st time listening to this song. Too upbeat-y. Don't like it.
17. Placebo - Ask for Answers
First time also. Not bad.
18. Counting Crows - Sullivan Street
Another 1st time. Nice. Liking the piano sound, and of course the voice of the vocalist (what his name, what his name?? Adam something..?). Really nice, seriously.
19. Smashing Pumpkins - Tonight, Tonight (reprise)
Did you see those lips playing the guitar at the prom? xD Hahah, sorry, can't help it. The song itself is beautiful and magical. However this version is less magical, but still..beautiful.
20. Muse - Muscle Museum
Pedhe introduced me to this song. I used to think that Muse is short for MUscle muSEum. Hahah. I love the intro so much and the "I don't want you to adore me, don't want you to ignore me".
21. Incubus - Are You In
I love this song. I love the video. I love Brandon Boyd in the video. And I love the "tsk tsk, ahh" part so much.
22. Oasis - Sunday Morning Call
I almost forgot about this song. Typical Oasis for me. I can like it so much sometimes, and I can get so bored with it some other times.
23. Dave Matthews Band - Space Between
Like I said, sucker for this kind of song! Better served with some rain outside.
24. Foo Fighters - Walking After You
Mellow. Just like I like it. Things just won't do without you, matter of fact.
25. Dewa - Kosong
I love and hate this song. I think it's been on my list of personal favorites for a tad too long.
Step 2: Put all of your music on random.
Step 3: Write down the first 25 songs it plays, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 4: Wait for complaints about the esoteric nature of your mp3s.
1. Slank - Terlalu Manis
One of Slank's best ones. Can't help thinking about a friend and her one moment in time ;p I personally don't have any sweet memory whatsoever nor anything more to say about this song. I just think it's that good for a local song.
2. Weezer - Keep Fishin' (demo)
Supernice. Just like other Weezer's songs. I love the video even more, with Kermit and Ms.Piggy and the rest of the gang. It's just the thought of you in love with someone else...
3. Coldplay - Moses
There are better days for these guys. But I do have one favorite line: "like moses had power over sea. so you've got a power over me."
4. The Cure - Cut Here (acoustic)
Good song, dunno what it's about. I also don't know the lyric. I just know the repetitive "I miss you" somewhere near the end, and the haw-inducing "if only is a wish too late". Interesting fact: Cut Here is an anagram for The Cure.
5. Travis - Writing to Reach You
I just listened to this song recently (I got these mp3 songs from Ebonk). Nice. Yeah, so-so. The common nature of Travis.
6. James Iha - No One's Gonna Hurt You
Also discovered this song just recently, but already, I love it. Sure, there might be a little lacking of creativity in the lyric dept, but it's nice to listen to it in the wee hours, when it's raining outside. My favorite.
7. Smashing Pumpkins - Today
Today is the greatest day I've ever known. Can't live for tomorrow, tomorrow's much too long. Dunno why it still reminds me of one of my unimportant "greatest days".
8. Pearl Jam - Better Man
One of the so-so good songs. However I loved this song so much back in elementary school...Or was it junior high?
9. Smashing Pumpkins - Farewell and Goodbye
I don't know this song. But it's slow and good enough for those merenung times. The title somehow intrigues me...So, I like it.
10. The Cure - Killing an Arab
I don't get the song and I don't like it either. And I know it's kinda racist, but the title cracks me up xD
11. Sixpence None the Richer - I Need Love
Time for guilty-pleasures-confession: I like some of their songs. Including this one. I even bought the soundtrack of the crappy Here on Earth to get this song.
12. Dewa 19 - Aku di Sini Untukmu
Like it. If you watch the video now, it'll definitely look crappy and cheap. But back in the days when I adored these guys, I enjoy watching the video. Tamara Blezinski looked great as always in it.
13. Radiohead - Let Down
A good song to listen to when I snuggle by myself beneath my blanket.
14. Weezer - o Girlfriend
It's okay. Reminds me of senior year and Oho. Random fact: I just found out that Weezer has a song called O Lisa? I definitely will make a song called O Slowdown ;D
15. Ben Folds Five - Bricks
I'm a sucker for this kind of song! The song that can make you go bengong and want to hug the pillow as tight as you can.
16. Third Eye Blind - Palm Reader
Although I claimed to be 3rd Eye Blind's fan, this is my 1st time listening to this song. Too upbeat-y. Don't like it.
17. Placebo - Ask for Answers
First time also. Not bad.
18. Counting Crows - Sullivan Street
Another 1st time. Nice. Liking the piano sound, and of course the voice of the vocalist (what his name, what his name?? Adam something..?). Really nice, seriously.
19. Smashing Pumpkins - Tonight, Tonight (reprise)
Did you see those lips playing the guitar at the prom? xD Hahah, sorry, can't help it. The song itself is beautiful and magical. However this version is less magical, but still..beautiful.
20. Muse - Muscle Museum
Pedhe introduced me to this song. I used to think that Muse is short for MUscle muSEum. Hahah. I love the intro so much and the "I don't want you to adore me, don't want you to ignore me".
21. Incubus - Are You In
I love this song. I love the video. I love Brandon Boyd in the video. And I love the "tsk tsk, ahh" part so much.
22. Oasis - Sunday Morning Call
I almost forgot about this song. Typical Oasis for me. I can like it so much sometimes, and I can get so bored with it some other times.
23. Dave Matthews Band - Space Between
Like I said, sucker for this kind of song! Better served with some rain outside.
24. Foo Fighters - Walking After You
Mellow. Just like I like it. Things just won't do without you, matter of fact.
25. Dewa - Kosong
I love and hate this song. I think it's been on my list of personal favorites for a tad too long.
-------------
Turns out, nothing that embarassing, huh? Thanks to Ebonk who supplied me with decently good songs.
you remain, turned away. turning further everyday.
The World Has Turned and Left Me Here
The world has turned and left me here
Just where I was before you appeared
And in your place, an empty space
Has filled the void behind my face
I just made love with your sweet memory
One thousand times in my head
You said you loved it more than ever
You said
You remain, turned away
Turning further every day
I talked for hours to your wallet photograph
And you just listened
You laughed enchanted by my intellect
Or maybe you didn't
You remain, turned away
Turning further every day
Do you believe what I sing now?
[weezer]
The world has turned and left me here
Just where I was before you appeared
And in your place, an empty space
Has filled the void behind my face
I just made love with your sweet memory
One thousand times in my head
You said you loved it more than ever
You said
You remain, turned away
Turning further every day
I talked for hours to your wallet photograph
And you just listened
You laughed enchanted by my intellect
Or maybe you didn't
You remain, turned away
Turning further every day
Do you believe what I sing now?
[weezer]
Friday, January 21, 2005
I need my hair just like Samson did.
Helloo. Thought I'd write something here. Lessee...
I and Pedhe finally went to Bandung by train last thursday! By train! We survived. Hahaha. We got excited and got very norak on the train. Then there was Bandung. It was fun! Bangun, Ebonk, Ingga, boozeweedmushroom, karaoke lounge, bowling alley, stars, and city lights. It was all good. Too bad, the inevergohometojakarta lanky guy was indeed going back to Jakarta the day we arrived. Blaah. Anyway, we went back to Jakarta on saturday and we headed straight to Rosel's. Bune was already there, and we were having a sleepover. Days surrounded by loved ones. How nice.
Aside from above, I guess no more worth-telling stuff. Heck, worth-telling or not, I'm still gonna write it down.
I so miss my long hair!
I want my long hair back. I know back then it often looked like a mess and I ended up putting it in a ponytail, but...I miss having something falling on my shoulder. I miss having something flowy and girly. Ack. It'll be a long, long waiting to do.
Here, take a look.
See, something flowy..
Even these look girl-like
I didn't mind cutting it short
But how did it turn into these??!
I know when my hair does grow back, I'll have the urge to cut it short. But right now, I want my long hairrr!!! *whiny*
People...They always want what they don't have.
I and Pedhe finally went to Bandung by train last thursday! By train! We survived. Hahaha. We got excited and got very norak on the train. Then there was Bandung. It was fun! Bangun, Ebonk, Ingga, boozeweedmushroom, karaoke lounge, bowling alley, stars, and city lights. It was all good. Too bad, the inevergohometojakarta lanky guy was indeed going back to Jakarta the day we arrived. Blaah. Anyway, we went back to Jakarta on saturday and we headed straight to Rosel's. Bune was already there, and we were having a sleepover. Days surrounded by loved ones. How nice.
Aside from above, I guess no more worth-telling stuff. Heck, worth-telling or not, I'm still gonna write it down.
I so miss my long hair!
I want my long hair back. I know back then it often looked like a mess and I ended up putting it in a ponytail, but...I miss having something falling on my shoulder. I miss having something flowy and girly. Ack. It'll be a long, long waiting to do.
Here, take a look.
See, something flowy..
Even these look girl-like
I didn't mind cutting it short
But how did it turn into these??!
I know when my hair does grow back, I'll have the urge to cut it short. But right now, I want my long hairrr!!! *whiny*
People...They always want what they don't have.
Sunday, January 02, 2005
.the best days you can get.
*ahem* Don't mind that boozehead below.
I don't have the energy to recap the NYE. So I'll keep it nice and short. I tried to smoke a cigarette right when the year turned. I was singing with some people to Mugho's guitar-playing. I remember wearing a pair of really dark sunglasses around the house so I didn't have to deal with sunlight. Then there was the morning ice cream. I remeber feeling okay and having fun.
I remember NOT wanting to sleep, bcos I'll never know if in a year or two from now I'll still have the friends and fun I have right now. Really, you'll never know. So I tried to stay awake as long as I can, and I'm glad that I did.
I had fun. Time for new year's speech...PedBunRos, love you bcos you're always there from time to time. From one NYE to another. I know you probably had someplace else to go (Bun: Syarif's friend's party, Rosel:..er, home?); and I know I was acting selfish by whining so that I could have the 4 of us together by the big countdown. But hey, you'll never know. Better get together as often as we can while we still can.
For the rest of last night's guests, thanks for still coming. Thanks for being the most pleasant and lovely bunch of jokers a girl could have. Love you all! And that would be Ebonk, Bangun, Jaya, Mugho, Eblack, Syarif, Maria, Wahyu...Did I leave out someone? All in all, happy newy people!
I don't have the energy to recap the NYE. So I'll keep it nice and short. I tried to smoke a cigarette right when the year turned. I was singing with some people to Mugho's guitar-playing. I remember wearing a pair of really dark sunglasses around the house so I didn't have to deal with sunlight. Then there was the morning ice cream. I remeber feeling okay and having fun.
I remember NOT wanting to sleep, bcos I'll never know if in a year or two from now I'll still have the friends and fun I have right now. Really, you'll never know. So I tried to stay awake as long as I can, and I'm glad that I did.
I had fun. Time for new year's speech...PedBunRos, love you bcos you're always there from time to time. From one NYE to another. I know you probably had someplace else to go (Bun: Syarif's friend's party, Rosel:..er, home?); and I know I was acting selfish by whining so that I could have the 4 of us together by the big countdown. But hey, you'll never know. Better get together as often as we can while we still can.
For the rest of last night's guests, thanks for still coming. Thanks for being the most pleasant and lovely bunch of jokers a girl could have. Love you all! And that would be Ebonk, Bangun, Jaya, Mugho, Eblack, Syarif, Maria, Wahyu...Did I leave out someone? All in all, happy newy people!
-------------
"Dan aku .. ingin selalu kau sentuh
Karna kamu
Yang bisa menyelamatkanku
Cuma kamu
Yang mampu mengendalikan aku"
[slank] xD
..despite everything..
Saturday, January 01, 2005
theres always someone there
but overall im happy, and gratful...ive survived, here's 2005. and everythings gonna be ok. they all say that. evrythings gonna be ok. believe in that. love you all. happy new year. i am okay! x)
2oo5~
here i am, NYE'05...in peds house with a spliff in my hand...hahaha...everyone is sleeping. the loves f my life is sleeping. bunepdross. my god. even syarif is too. maria and jaya doing whatever they do. dammit i cant think right now. shit. ive smoked like tons of spliffs, but i cant sleepp. dammit. cant stop smpoking,,,i hv to do something. anythinggg. everyoen cant sleeppp, i dont want them to. but i cant wake anyone. dmmitt, help me pleasee. pls save me. fuck you. fuckin save me! im tireddd.. it's 5 oclock and im stupid.
wait,ebonk bghn eblek and ...who2....ooo mugho are still awake. theyre playing cardss. damitt
you were here fuck you. you were fun. i wanna sleep but i cnt. happy new year bytheway people. love you all. ive been love you all since forver..time to go out.
plaYed cards just then. pls dont go people, no more.
let dowwn..thanks mr york for singing it.
wait,ebonk bghn eblek and ...who2....ooo mugho are still awake. theyre playing cardss. damitt
you were here fuck you. you were fun. i wanna sleep but i cnt. happy new year bytheway people. love you all. ive been love you all since forver..time to go out.
plaYed cards just then. pls dont go people, no more.
let dowwn..thanks mr york for singing it.
Sunday, December 26, 2004
..throwing useless memorabilia away..
I should be doing my assignment right now. But godknows I can only work under pressure. Since the pressure isn't high enough right now, so here I am, babbling. And oyeah, I can't open Friendster.com. That should be a good thing, but just like a car accident, you can't help checking it out everytime you can.
Anywayss...New year's eve is coming up. I (and the others) still haven't got the slightest fuck where we will be spending the evening. I guess it's just not the same when I (or my party planner partners) aren't directly involved. I miss the decision making, the last-minute preparation, and the ego-satisfying feeling knowing you & your posse own the party. But somehow I'm not in the mood for making efforts anymore.
...I had no idea the few weeks before NYE could be so boring.
I guess things are changing. That's another issue for me lately. Things are changing, some people aren't around anymore, and...yeah, those stuff. Damn people and their "own" lives. I can't think of any right now, but there are many reasons why I'm feeling like this. Like getting these hints to move on (from whatever that is), to let go and stop dreaming (of whatever that is). Damn, I can't believe now I'm trying to write my nagging thoughts down, my head goes blank. Maybe I'll be back when I have my thoughts sorted out. All I know is, things are just not as "lucu" as they used to.
"Looking back at sunsets on the Eastside
We lost track of the time
Dreams aren't what they used to be
Some things sat by so carelessly"
[the killers]
Anywayss...New year's eve is coming up. I (and the others) still haven't got the slightest fuck where we will be spending the evening. I guess it's just not the same when I (or my party planner partners) aren't directly involved. I miss the decision making, the last-minute preparation, and the ego-satisfying feeling knowing you & your posse own the party. But somehow I'm not in the mood for making efforts anymore.
...I had no idea the few weeks before NYE could be so boring.
I guess things are changing. That's another issue for me lately. Things are changing, some people aren't around anymore, and...yeah, those stuff. Damn people and their "own" lives. I can't think of any right now, but there are many reasons why I'm feeling like this. Like getting these hints to move on (from whatever that is), to let go and stop dreaming (of whatever that is). Damn, I can't believe now I'm trying to write my nagging thoughts down, my head goes blank. Maybe I'll be back when I have my thoughts sorted out. All I know is, things are just not as "lucu" as they used to.
"Looking back at sunsets on the Eastside
We lost track of the time
Dreams aren't what they used to be
Some things sat by so carelessly"
[the killers]
Saturday, December 25, 2004
..I just know I'm so lonely..
I've been waiting for you to call me, been waiting for the time of my life
I just know I'm so lonely here without you...
I've been needing the truth to enlight me, been waiting in vain or in lies?
I just know I'm so lonely here without you...
Cause I'm ready to play now, love strikes, calling me back again
I'm ready to play now...
Cause I'm ready to play now, love strikes, calling me back again
I'm ready to play now...
Now I won't be waiting for you to to call me, not waiting for the rest of my life
Now I must let go of these feelings and make it without you
Now I won't be letting the doubt in to stall me, I just have to get on with my life
And hopefully soon I won't be thinkin about you
Cause I'm ready to play now, love strikes, calling me back again
I'm ready to play now...
Cause I'm ready to play now, love strikes, calling me back again
I'm ready to play now...
Dying here without you...
Think I was looking for trouble
Think I was looking for home in a foreign land
Think I was caught in a bubble
Now I think it's time to reach the right hand
[eskobar]
I just know I'm so lonely here without you...
I've been needing the truth to enlight me, been waiting in vain or in lies?
I just know I'm so lonely here without you...
Cause I'm ready to play now, love strikes, calling me back again
I'm ready to play now...
Cause I'm ready to play now, love strikes, calling me back again
I'm ready to play now...
Now I won't be waiting for you to to call me, not waiting for the rest of my life
Now I must let go of these feelings and make it without you
Now I won't be letting the doubt in to stall me, I just have to get on with my life
And hopefully soon I won't be thinkin about you
Cause I'm ready to play now, love strikes, calling me back again
I'm ready to play now...
Cause I'm ready to play now, love strikes, calling me back again
I'm ready to play now...
Dying here without you...
Think I was looking for trouble
Think I was looking for home in a foreign land
Think I was caught in a bubble
Now I think it's time to reach the right hand
[eskobar]
Tuesday, December 14, 2004
..this time when flashes come..
Hello, it's been another while huh? Here I am, back again in front of some sight-wrecking monitor, writing things. Nothing new since the last I came here. I'm still under the boredom attack which feels worse now. To make things even worse, my computer broke down and its connection to the internet...godknows what happens to it. *Fyi, now I'm at my mom's office.
Ugh! I feel like getting the hell out of here! Here where? Here, my life, these routines, these days...I'M BORED! Nothing's exactly wrong, but that's it--nothing exactly happens. Shouldn't this time of the year be the time when it gets full of festivity and joy? Now I feel anything but. It's like there's this big void inside..It's like my surroundings suddenly become empty and awfully quiet. Crap, I dunno.
Dammit! I feel like spitting these words out instead of smiles, but I can't. What is happening to me?? Owell, maybe it's just my over-dramatizing alter-ego takes over myself due to my hormonal imbalance with my period and all.
Can someone give me a lifetime supply of Prozac? If not, then, excpect to hear some more.
"Never going to reach my goal
I know ’cos I have been told
Never finding happiness
Eternally in unrest
This is where the love lies
I’ve seen to the other side
It’s always been just out of reach
Yeah but always just within my sight"
[ash]
Ugh! I feel like getting the hell out of here! Here where? Here, my life, these routines, these days...I'M BORED! Nothing's exactly wrong, but that's it--nothing exactly happens. Shouldn't this time of the year be the time when it gets full of festivity and joy? Now I feel anything but. It's like there's this big void inside..It's like my surroundings suddenly become empty and awfully quiet. Crap, I dunno.
Dammit! I feel like spitting these words out instead of smiles, but I can't. What is happening to me?? Owell, maybe it's just my over-dramatizing alter-ego takes over myself due to my hormonal imbalance with my period and all.
Can someone give me a lifetime supply of Prozac? If not, then, excpect to hear some more.
"Never going to reach my goal
I know ’cos I have been told
Never finding happiness
Eternally in unrest
This is where the love lies
I’ve seen to the other side
It’s always been just out of reach
Yeah but always just within my sight"
[ash]
Friday, November 26, 2004
sometimes a month is too long for a start
Been quite a while, huh? Due to some demand, here I am..writing in this blog once again. It's been..what, a month...since the last I let out some ramblings.
So, here goes,
On saturday the 6th, Oho, the girls and I held this "buka puasa angkatan" at Oho's apt. Going hectic on the last minutes, draining our wallets for a short-notice reservation fee, and inviting people, of course. However, somewhat predictably, the guests were only about a half of our invitation list. Well I guess you can't expect every single person to be "asik", can you? >=p But it was still great. I don't need the whole--quote unquote--angkatan to have fun. Plus, that was one more event that can be added to our resume as the so-called party-planners xD
Next, following Rosel, now all BunePedhe & I have turned 20. The big two-oh! However, despite my fear since forever...on the day I turned 20, I looked into the mirror, and it was still a pleasant view to see. It still is xD So I guess 20hood is okay. Quick recap on my birthday: Went to Dixie Kemang for dinner with the girls, Ebonk, Bangun and Gibond. Later that night, went for a dose of Starbucks in Citos (Ped's treat) and then Ingga came by. It was always hilariously fun being with those bunch. The girls, the loveable Ingga, BangunEbonk and their neverending cheap jokes, and even Gibond was behaving nicely. Thank God.
Finally, the latest "event" I've gone to is Anyer. As a closure for the very short Lebaran holiday, I agreed to go to Anyer (or was that Carita?) with the guys. The only girls who came were me & Pedhe. The line-up: Ebonk, Bangun, Gibond, Chirul, Jikun, Rhino, Andi, Jaya, and Ebonk's friend--Ikhsan. Despite me struggling to survive for 3 whole days with the kinda-ick bathroom there, it was a great holiday...Kinda. The upsides: the road trip in one car with PedBgnBonk. There never was a dull moment. Then I was taught to gamble. Hahah, you'll never know when you're gonna need this kind of ability, right? And then there was the booze. After what seemed like years not touching those bottles, I drank again there. It was good for a while; it was like it was my 1st time again xD However, here comes the downside: I got nausea (sp?) and I had to throw up in that icky bathroom. Ugh. My head was spinning all night and all through the morning. I dare to say that I won't touch booze again for at least...dunno, until NY's eve...? xp
Okay, there goes, the stories from this past 1 month. In betweens there were Bune & Rosel's birthday dinner (+coffee), Lebaran, and some more things.
I now hang out more in my campus, although it's dead boring. And I don't wanna go home bcos it's even more boring...like a tomb! So voila, boredom attack. Somebody, please, take me out of heeeere! xP
"My shadow's only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
Til then I walk alone"
[green day]
So, here goes,
On saturday the 6th, Oho, the girls and I held this "buka puasa angkatan" at Oho's apt. Going hectic on the last minutes, draining our wallets for a short-notice reservation fee, and inviting people, of course. However, somewhat predictably, the guests were only about a half of our invitation list. Well I guess you can't expect every single person to be "asik", can you? >=p But it was still great. I don't need the whole--quote unquote--angkatan to have fun. Plus, that was one more event that can be added to our resume as the so-called party-planners xD
Next, following Rosel, now all BunePedhe & I have turned 20. The big two-oh! However, despite my fear since forever...on the day I turned 20, I looked into the mirror, and it was still a pleasant view to see. It still is xD So I guess 20hood is okay. Quick recap on my birthday: Went to Dixie Kemang for dinner with the girls, Ebonk, Bangun and Gibond. Later that night, went for a dose of Starbucks in Citos (Ped's treat) and then Ingga came by. It was always hilariously fun being with those bunch. The girls, the loveable Ingga, BangunEbonk and their neverending cheap jokes, and even Gibond was behaving nicely. Thank God.
Finally, the latest "event" I've gone to is Anyer. As a closure for the very short Lebaran holiday, I agreed to go to Anyer (or was that Carita?) with the guys. The only girls who came were me & Pedhe. The line-up: Ebonk, Bangun, Gibond, Chirul, Jikun, Rhino, Andi, Jaya, and Ebonk's friend--Ikhsan. Despite me struggling to survive for 3 whole days with the kinda-ick bathroom there, it was a great holiday...Kinda. The upsides: the road trip in one car with PedBgnBonk. There never was a dull moment. Then I was taught to gamble. Hahah, you'll never know when you're gonna need this kind of ability, right? And then there was the booze. After what seemed like years not touching those bottles, I drank again there. It was good for a while; it was like it was my 1st time again xD However, here comes the downside: I got nausea (sp?) and I had to throw up in that icky bathroom. Ugh. My head was spinning all night and all through the morning. I dare to say that I won't touch booze again for at least...dunno, until NY's eve...? xp
Okay, there goes, the stories from this past 1 month. In betweens there were Bune & Rosel's birthday dinner (+coffee), Lebaran, and some more things.
-----------------------------
I now hang out more in my campus, although it's dead boring. And I don't wanna go home bcos it's even more boring...like a tomb! So voila, boredom attack. Somebody, please, take me out of heeeere! xP
"My shadow's only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
Til then I walk alone"
[green day]
Sunday, October 10, 2004
our own beautiful chords
It's been a super-duper fun saturday night! But before I go into the details, I just want to say that this thing with ms.holier-than-thou really irritates me. So I'm not that forgiving, so can't we leave it at that? I somehow still find a way to get annoyed by her. A friend of mine kept telling and waiting for me to let my anger out and actually confront ms.holier-than-thou. Dammit, how I want that very much. But I'm not even in the mood! I'm mellowing down here. Yeah, whatever. Maybe this is the last time I write something about it here, because it's just not worth it.
Whoanyway, you know (or maybe you don't) how the girls and I had been planning to go karaoke-ing since like forever, but we never found the perfect time? Well, tonight we finally did! I kinda booked them (Bune & Rozelle, I mean) from what, 2 days ago, and they kept their promises! So off we went starting the night a little earlier than usual, since both Bune & Rozelle couldn't go home late. We went to Izzy Pizza at Deha first for dinner. Two pans of pizza with different toppings, iced lemon tea that kept getting refilled, and the girls...voila, I had a great QT. We talked about this and that. Things that you could never talk with anyone else, things that so unimportant no one else would listen; you know, the nothing-and-everything package. I'm still glad they're still here--my everything when everything else seems unreliable.
As soon as we were full, we headed straight to Nav at D'best. There was no empty room at first unless we were willing to wait for an hour or so. Thankfully, there was one available room at Nav 2. You know the rest, we sang at the top of our lungs, danced like nuts, and the whole package. We started the karaoke session with Tommy Page's "a shoulder to cry on". Can you find a more perfect cheesy song to sing with your best friends?? Then we went a bit overboard with the Backstreet Boys and N*Sync. We also went for the 90s rock (Bon Jovi's "always" and Guns N Roses' "paradise city"), corny local songs and of course we danced the dance of Macarena xD Oyeah, we also sang Duran Duran's "Ordinary World", and we made jokes on dedicating the song to some band that sang this song once (not Duran Duran ;p), imitating them, and dedicating the song for ourselves. How corny could we get?? But it was still hilarious! Lesson learned from tonight: none of us can sing. Our voice, it's either too high-pitched and squeaky OR throaty and flat xp
Apparently 2 hours fly that fast when you're karaokeing. I was tempted to ask for another hour, but of course there was Bune and her curfew. So we ended our night; not before taking some seriously cute pictures, surely!! Here, indulge yourself...
better work on that singing, girls!
karaoke queens
Whoanyway, you know (or maybe you don't) how the girls and I had been planning to go karaoke-ing since like forever, but we never found the perfect time? Well, tonight we finally did! I kinda booked them (Bune & Rozelle, I mean) from what, 2 days ago, and they kept their promises! So off we went starting the night a little earlier than usual, since both Bune & Rozelle couldn't go home late. We went to Izzy Pizza at Deha first for dinner. Two pans of pizza with different toppings, iced lemon tea that kept getting refilled, and the girls...voila, I had a great QT. We talked about this and that. Things that you could never talk with anyone else, things that so unimportant no one else would listen; you know, the nothing-and-everything package. I'm still glad they're still here--my everything when everything else seems unreliable.
As soon as we were full, we headed straight to Nav at D'best. There was no empty room at first unless we were willing to wait for an hour or so. Thankfully, there was one available room at Nav 2. You know the rest, we sang at the top of our lungs, danced like nuts, and the whole package. We started the karaoke session with Tommy Page's "a shoulder to cry on". Can you find a more perfect cheesy song to sing with your best friends?? Then we went a bit overboard with the Backstreet Boys and N*Sync. We also went for the 90s rock (Bon Jovi's "always" and Guns N Roses' "paradise city"), corny local songs and of course we danced the dance of Macarena xD Oyeah, we also sang Duran Duran's "Ordinary World", and we made jokes on dedicating the song to some band that sang this song once (not Duran Duran ;p), imitating them, and dedicating the song for ourselves. How corny could we get?? But it was still hilarious! Lesson learned from tonight: none of us can sing. Our voice, it's either too high-pitched and squeaky OR throaty and flat xp
Apparently 2 hours fly that fast when you're karaokeing. I was tempted to ask for another hour, but of course there was Bune and her curfew. So we ended our night; not before taking some seriously cute pictures, surely!! Here, indulge yourself...
better work on that singing, girls!
karaoke queens
And when you need a shoulder to cry on
When you need a friend to rely on
When the whole world is gone
You won't be alone
I'll be there, I'll be your shoulder to cry on
I'll be there, I'll be your friend to rely on
When the whole world's gone
You won't be alone, 'cause I'll be there
Tuesday, October 05, 2004
brief note about brief period of fun
Went to GK this afternoon with the girls. Well, I went with Pedhe, and Bune was with Rosel. But still, we got together as soon as we got there. High school still felt kinda...homey this afternoon. Some people I know were there. Angga, Oho, Bapet, Bangun, Ebonk, Gibon, Maria, Tesar and his 2 angels, and some more. Still, the people weren't as many as they were last year. Even the dissing-target girls weren't as much. Shucks, there was only that self-promoted "ledom" to diss about. All in all, it was still great to be in that basketball court sitting and joking stupidly with your best friends. And looking at someone's hot...asset wasn't a bad thing either ;p
Afterwards the girls and I went to Tomodachi for dinner; with Ito and Maria joined us later on. I loved it when I was with the girls, sitting in some place nice, and talked about nothing and everything. Especially on a school night like this, meeting them is just priceless. I'll never get tired of saying this, girls, I love you and every time spent with you!! x) I wish I could just hold them and beg them NOT to go home and just run away to some place. Impossible, innit...? Oh well.
Um...Do I have more updates for today? Creo que no. So, see you when there's something worth-writing here; when something worth-writing does happen.
Afterwards the girls and I went to Tomodachi for dinner; with Ito and Maria joined us later on. I loved it when I was with the girls, sitting in some place nice, and talked about nothing and everything. Especially on a school night like this, meeting them is just priceless. I'll never get tired of saying this, girls, I love you and every time spent with you!! x) I wish I could just hold them and beg them NOT to go home and just run away to some place. Impossible, innit...? Oh well.
Um...Do I have more updates for today? Creo que no. So, see you when there's something worth-writing here; when something worth-writing does happen.
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
longing
My sister got married yesterday. It was interesting, tiring, in some way tacky, and I'm glad it's over. The girls came and we took pictures of us in kebaya. The last time we wore kebaya altogether was about 2 years ago, graduation day. We looked cute and all back then, and damn we looked beyond beautiful in yesterday's pics x)
Dad and Riri were there although my witchy-bitchy stepmom wasn't--which is good. I wouldn't normally do this, but my stepsister and I, we were kinda bonding. Well, I mean we talked about everything and we hung out together. I don't know if it'll last, but it was kinda fun. It was definitely something new. Anyway, before the reception started, when everyone was stressed over nothing, mom snapped at me for replying her bitching. And I was so upset I was on the verge of crying. Then suddenly my dad showed up in front of me, and when he saw me lips all trembling with glassy eyes, he gave me that soothing and calming look. And right then, I missed him so much! I mean, wouldn't it be great if he was around? I'd have someone else to turn to, mom wouldn't be alone, and lots of other possibilities. Oh well.
Anyhoo, here's an irrelevant side note: I just chatted with Agay on the MSN not too long ago. He said that some guys ("around 20", so I quote) were gathering in Bulungan on the 24th. When I asked who, he mentioned some names and then he forgot the rest and then he said he wanted to go offline. Shucks. No one significant was there, right? ...Right?
picture time!
need i say more?
dad and me
everyone, meet my younger sister
Dad and Riri were there although my witchy-bitchy stepmom wasn't--which is good. I wouldn't normally do this, but my stepsister and I, we were kinda bonding. Well, I mean we talked about everything and we hung out together. I don't know if it'll last, but it was kinda fun. It was definitely something new. Anyway, before the reception started, when everyone was stressed over nothing, mom snapped at me for replying her bitching. And I was so upset I was on the verge of crying. Then suddenly my dad showed up in front of me, and when he saw me lips all trembling with glassy eyes, he gave me that soothing and calming look. And right then, I missed him so much! I mean, wouldn't it be great if he was around? I'd have someone else to turn to, mom wouldn't be alone, and lots of other possibilities. Oh well.
Anyhoo, here's an irrelevant side note: I just chatted with Agay on the MSN not too long ago. He said that some guys ("around 20", so I quote) were gathering in Bulungan on the 24th. When I asked who, he mentioned some names and then he forgot the rest and then he said he wanted to go offline. Shucks. No one significant was there, right? ...Right?
picture time!
need i say more?
dad and me
everyone, meet my younger sister
Sunday, September 26, 2004
surrealm
This episode, on Days of My Life: Someone I know decides to move on, people in my house are moving out, I decide I don't want to deal with who-used-to-be the most dealable (shut up, that's a new word, I created it) person in my campus, I had a...well, nice dream about him last night and there's still that "nothing" that I keep dreading about. Here goes...
First one, someone I know is moving on (for this person, I wish you all the luck, hon). Then last friday (what was supposed to be Bat's birthday), no one gathered around in our old high school anymore. Point is, maybe everything about my oh-so-precious past is just merely...old high school memories. They're in the past now. I just have to deal with the fact that everything won't ever be the same again like the old time. They have to change, and maybe I have to try to...well, go out and explore the rest of the world more. Can't live in memories and dreams forever, right? Yea, anyway, that's just a brief thought.
Next, Tante Rika was getting married again last week and she moves out to her new house with his husband. Fine by me. But Khesia and Archie have to go with her too. Well, they haven't moved out yet, but they have to soon. My sister is getting married in 2 days and soon she'll be out of the house too. And then Tante Danti is moving out to her new apartment sometime after Lebaran. Let's discuss the predicted aftermath. No more Khesia and Archie means no more switching-swapping-lending-and-borrowing clothes. It also means no more people to talk to, to joke around with, to diss parents with, and plainly no more good distraction. Next one, without my sister around, that means it's up to me to take care of Brownie. And as much as I love dogs, as I love mine, I don't do good in taking care of pets for a long-term. I can always ask mbak Iim for help, but I can't bear Brownie's sad eyes when no one is around to play with him. Lastly, with tante Danti out, then no more single woman staying at home accompanying another single woman--my mom. Mom would probably make it hard for me to go out often when the house is practically empty. Damn. Wasn't I the one who want to get out from here since the elementary school? Now I'm the one who's still here. ...Damn.
About that person whom I fought with not too long ago. I know she said sorry, and she claimed her outburst was just a temporary-insanity thingy, and all. But I don't wanna handle any situation like that anymore. I'm not the forgive-and-forget type of person. Hate you once, and I'll feel weird with you forever. I happen to know that she feels lonely, and I happen to know all about being lonely. But I guess she just has to deal with it, bcos I can't deal with her anymore. Could you be more unforgiving, Run?
Finally, about the guy. One of you may already know that I feel nothing the last time I saw him (how you can guess, I still don't know). I'm still curious about this "nothing". Is it really nothing? Will it last? Is it good or not? Should I be glad? Bcos it's really a drastic change in just what, a few weeks? What used to be the head-over-heels giddy, now is just a-lil-giddy-that's-over-once-I-don't-see-him giddy. What used to be a blind rage of jealousy, now is just plainly "ow, lucky her" brief state of mind. Isn't that weird? All these months, tears, smiles, and all for nothing? Pedhe said I should wait til the next time I see him. And I thought I would (see him, that is) sometime on the 24th of September; but no, I didn't. Curious, curious, curious. What does this mean?!
Speaking of the guy, I had a dream about him last night. It was interesting and nice all the way...I mean, altogether. Heheh. Yep, suddenly when I'm swarming with nothing, bang, he popped up. Well, that's just a tad newsflash bcos let me tell you, this dream is fuckin' interesting! Hell yeah. The nothing is still nothing, but there's a brand new sense of lust here xp
There you go...a bit of the everything-and-nothing of me lately.
"Guess I'm stuck in a dream
Surrounded by colored leaves on the ground
As I stare at the trees I see one fall down in my hand
As I start to explore I can't ignore a man
He turns his head around
His face was all worn by the sun
I'm going out for a while
So I can get high with my friends, I will
I'm going out for a while
Don't wait up cause I won't be home
Today...
Drifting down a road
Losing myself in a dream
Feel my hands getting cold
Sat in a boat on a lake
Climbing up trying my best
As I sink
Climbing up trying my best
As I sink again
Lying back on the floor
Reaching up high into space
See myself in a glass
I'm counting the lines on my face
Again
I'm counting the lines on my face
Again..."
[feeder]
First one, someone I know is moving on (for this person, I wish you all the luck, hon). Then last friday (what was supposed to be Bat's birthday), no one gathered around in our old high school anymore. Point is, maybe everything about my oh-so-precious past is just merely...old high school memories. They're in the past now. I just have to deal with the fact that everything won't ever be the same again like the old time. They have to change, and maybe I have to try to...well, go out and explore the rest of the world more. Can't live in memories and dreams forever, right? Yea, anyway, that's just a brief thought.
Next, Tante Rika was getting married again last week and she moves out to her new house with his husband. Fine by me. But Khesia and Archie have to go with her too. Well, they haven't moved out yet, but they have to soon. My sister is getting married in 2 days and soon she'll be out of the house too. And then Tante Danti is moving out to her new apartment sometime after Lebaran. Let's discuss the predicted aftermath. No more Khesia and Archie means no more switching-swapping-lending-and-borrowing clothes. It also means no more people to talk to, to joke around with, to diss parents with, and plainly no more good distraction. Next one, without my sister around, that means it's up to me to take care of Brownie. And as much as I love dogs, as I love mine, I don't do good in taking care of pets for a long-term. I can always ask mbak Iim for help, but I can't bear Brownie's sad eyes when no one is around to play with him. Lastly, with tante Danti out, then no more single woman staying at home accompanying another single woman--my mom. Mom would probably make it hard for me to go out often when the house is practically empty. Damn. Wasn't I the one who want to get out from here since the elementary school? Now I'm the one who's still here. ...Damn.
About that person whom I fought with not too long ago. I know she said sorry, and she claimed her outburst was just a temporary-insanity thingy, and all. But I don't wanna handle any situation like that anymore. I'm not the forgive-and-forget type of person. Hate you once, and I'll feel weird with you forever. I happen to know that she feels lonely, and I happen to know all about being lonely. But I guess she just has to deal with it, bcos I can't deal with her anymore. Could you be more unforgiving, Run?
Finally, about the guy. One of you may already know that I feel nothing the last time I saw him (how you can guess, I still don't know). I'm still curious about this "nothing". Is it really nothing? Will it last? Is it good or not? Should I be glad? Bcos it's really a drastic change in just what, a few weeks? What used to be the head-over-heels giddy, now is just a-lil-giddy-that's-over-once-I-don't-see-him giddy. What used to be a blind rage of jealousy, now is just plainly "ow, lucky her" brief state of mind. Isn't that weird? All these months, tears, smiles, and all for nothing? Pedhe said I should wait til the next time I see him. And I thought I would (see him, that is) sometime on the 24th of September; but no, I didn't. Curious, curious, curious. What does this mean?!
Speaking of the guy, I had a dream about him last night. It was interesting and nice all the way...I mean, altogether. Heheh. Yep, suddenly when I'm swarming with nothing, bang, he popped up. Well, that's just a tad newsflash bcos let me tell you, this dream is fuckin' interesting! Hell yeah. The nothing is still nothing, but there's a brand new sense of lust here xp
There you go...a bit of the everything-and-nothing of me lately.
"Guess I'm stuck in a dream
Surrounded by colored leaves on the ground
As I stare at the trees I see one fall down in my hand
As I start to explore I can't ignore a man
He turns his head around
His face was all worn by the sun
I'm going out for a while
So I can get high with my friends, I will
I'm going out for a while
Don't wait up cause I won't be home
Today...
Drifting down a road
Losing myself in a dream
Feel my hands getting cold
Sat in a boat on a lake
Climbing up trying my best
As I sink
Climbing up trying my best
As I sink again
Lying back on the floor
Reaching up high into space
See myself in a glass
I'm counting the lines on my face
Again
I'm counting the lines on my face
Again..."
[feeder]
Thursday, September 23, 2004
quick note
New address, people. Um, what people? There's only like, one person who reads this. Long story made short: Sindro went ballistic over my little confession about the last saturday night. Not wanting to deal with objected people, I changed the address. Now she's shutting down her blog too, saying sorry and stuff. Whatthehell...
Anyway, maybe there's more to write here, but not tonight. Tomorrow maybe. Or even, when this September finally ends. Au revoir!
I envy people who smoke. They have something to suck when they feel like sucking. When I suck, I just suck.
Anyway, maybe there's more to write here, but not tonight. Tomorrow maybe. Or even, when this September finally ends. Au revoir!
I envy people who smoke. They have something to suck when they feel like sucking. When I suck, I just suck.
Monday, September 20, 2004
ditch my work? sounds like F-U-N!
o1. IKMI's gathering ~ check
o2. Rika's wedding ~ uncheck
o3. Riva's wedding ~ uncheck
I finally went to puncak for the gathering--or rather, initation--from friday until yesterday. I took a ride in Monik's car with Memmy and Yasmine. As soon as we got there, well, you know the story...Oblivious freshemen got yelled, usually-nice seniors went bad (hellow, Nand and Mon :p), and me? I still felt stupid trying to yell uncontrollably to those freshmen.
It wasn't that bad actually if it wasn't for this nagging, tears-inducing feeling like I didn't belong. Yep, I got homesick very, very frequently. And that was only the 1st day. I didn't get to sleep until like, 2 am, sunday morning and I had to wake up at 3 or so. It was so FUCKIN' cold, I wore 2-3 jackets at once. I had to sleep on the floor with this torn our carpet. I had people asking me to go downstairs 2 secs before I fell asleep upstairs, and when I got downstairs, this girl with her annoying voice kept telling me to sleep upstairs bcos of this and that. It was FRUSTRATING! I ended up crying myself to my barely-2-hour-long sleep. There goes my confession of the week.
By the 2nd day, Pedhe, Bangun, Bune and Syarif came by to visit. I wanted to go with them so much, I lied and ditched the initiation. I felt bad, I really did. But hey, it's over anyway, right? Well, for those of you who kept asking me where I had been saturday night, here goes...
We went to KFC near the villa, and then to Taman Safari. We took the night safari. I had been wanting to do that since forever, and we finally did! It had been ages since the last I went there, so I got very excited like a 5-year old. I think Pedhe & Bune did too. We were taking stupid pics and laughing our asses off. It was definitely fun! When we took the safari bus, we were actually psyched seeing those animals upclose. Those tigers are cute! Then, when we almost got out of the jungle, the bus driver suddenly went mad with his driving. He turned left and right due to the curvy road in a crazy speed, in the dark, with this animal-and bomb sounds playing. It was lame, but it was hilarious!
After the safari ride, we went to the theme park and tried some of the rides there. The coaster, the not-so-crazy "crazy plane", the ferris wheel. Lame, lame, lame, but it was definitely more fun than staying in the villa. Oyeah, Ped & I took a short ride on the camel. Hahah, we were so scared we looked like a couple of morons. Lastly, there were this baby tiger (2 months old, I think) and an orangutan. They were so tamed and cute, we all had our pictures taken with them. Love 'em!!! x)
As it was getting late, we were getting hungry. So up we went to one of those warungs in Puncak Pas. It was cold also, but at least I got to eat Poffertjes and drink something aside from water and hot tea (no offense people :p). Afterwards, despite Sind's texts (sorry, Sind), I agreed to go to history dept's initiation. I only knew Baralig, Gibond, and Dion there. But it was still comfy. The longer I stayed there, the more I wanted to stay. Besides the usual coffee-and-tea, they served chocolate milk! That wasn't all, there was also booze. For guests! Though I didn't touch them, inspite of me trying to cut down my dose of booze. However, there were spliffs of weed. Finally! I was hoping Bangun'd bring them (which he didn't), who knew Gibond had some with him?
However, a while after midnight, I had to go back to the english' villa. I hate the way I had to drag PedBunBangSyar along to "another planet" so Bangun called. The thing I hate most, when I came back to the villa, no one actually needed me. No one asked me to do something. I think they need me bcos they always panicked whenever they felt short-handed. Except for looking for the emergency lamp, I wasn't doing anything productive. I was practically sleeping unaffected by the noise all through the trial (don't blame me, the weeds are good). I just went here and there during the brainwash session. I just tried to hold back the freshmen when they were rebelling. And yet, the show went on succesfully, just like what everyone hoped for. Come to think of it, I should've agreed when Bune advised me to stay at the sejarah's initiation.
Well, every good thing must come to an end, right? On the bright side, I have a ride home by sunday ;)
[Few messages for people]
Pedhe, Bune, Bangun, Syarif: Super duper thanks times thousands for taking me away in an unconventional saturday night. And thanks for the company and the ride home.
English 2oo2 class: I apologize for ditching you guys, but I'm not sorry.
Yos: I hate you, bitch, bitch, bitch! I know I'm not in the place to say this, but you are useless, even more than I am. I never saw you keeping your promises or even helping me with stuff up there!
[Picture Time!!]
one of the stupid pics we took
notice Pedhe's too-tight grip to my neck?
he couldn't keep still, but he still the cutest thing alive!
macannnn! ;)
o2. Rika's wedding ~ uncheck
o3. Riva's wedding ~ uncheck
I finally went to puncak for the gathering--or rather, initation--from friday until yesterday. I took a ride in Monik's car with Memmy and Yasmine. As soon as we got there, well, you know the story...Oblivious freshemen got yelled, usually-nice seniors went bad (hellow, Nand and Mon :p), and me? I still felt stupid trying to yell uncontrollably to those freshmen.
It wasn't that bad actually if it wasn't for this nagging, tears-inducing feeling like I didn't belong. Yep, I got homesick very, very frequently. And that was only the 1st day. I didn't get to sleep until like, 2 am, sunday morning and I had to wake up at 3 or so. It was so FUCKIN' cold, I wore 2-3 jackets at once. I had to sleep on the floor with this torn our carpet. I had people asking me to go downstairs 2 secs before I fell asleep upstairs, and when I got downstairs, this girl with her annoying voice kept telling me to sleep upstairs bcos of this and that. It was FRUSTRATING! I ended up crying myself to my barely-2-hour-long sleep. There goes my confession of the week.
By the 2nd day, Pedhe, Bangun, Bune and Syarif came by to visit. I wanted to go with them so much, I lied and ditched the initiation. I felt bad, I really did. But hey, it's over anyway, right? Well, for those of you who kept asking me where I had been saturday night, here goes...
We went to KFC near the villa, and then to Taman Safari. We took the night safari. I had been wanting to do that since forever, and we finally did! It had been ages since the last I went there, so I got very excited like a 5-year old. I think Pedhe & Bune did too. We were taking stupid pics and laughing our asses off. It was definitely fun! When we took the safari bus, we were actually psyched seeing those animals upclose. Those tigers are cute! Then, when we almost got out of the jungle, the bus driver suddenly went mad with his driving. He turned left and right due to the curvy road in a crazy speed, in the dark, with this animal-and bomb sounds playing. It was lame, but it was hilarious!
After the safari ride, we went to the theme park and tried some of the rides there. The coaster, the not-so-crazy "crazy plane", the ferris wheel. Lame, lame, lame, but it was definitely more fun than staying in the villa. Oyeah, Ped & I took a short ride on the camel. Hahah, we were so scared we looked like a couple of morons. Lastly, there were this baby tiger (2 months old, I think) and an orangutan. They were so tamed and cute, we all had our pictures taken with them. Love 'em!!! x)
As it was getting late, we were getting hungry. So up we went to one of those warungs in Puncak Pas. It was cold also, but at least I got to eat Poffertjes and drink something aside from water and hot tea (no offense people :p). Afterwards, despite Sind's texts (sorry, Sind), I agreed to go to history dept's initiation. I only knew Baralig, Gibond, and Dion there. But it was still comfy. The longer I stayed there, the more I wanted to stay. Besides the usual coffee-and-tea, they served chocolate milk! That wasn't all, there was also booze. For guests! Though I didn't touch them, inspite of me trying to cut down my dose of booze. However, there were spliffs of weed. Finally! I was hoping Bangun'd bring them (which he didn't), who knew Gibond had some with him?
However, a while after midnight, I had to go back to the english' villa. I hate the way I had to drag PedBunBangSyar along to "another planet" so Bangun called. The thing I hate most, when I came back to the villa, no one actually needed me. No one asked me to do something. I think they need me bcos they always panicked whenever they felt short-handed. Except for looking for the emergency lamp, I wasn't doing anything productive. I was practically sleeping unaffected by the noise all through the trial (don't blame me, the weeds are good). I just went here and there during the brainwash session. I just tried to hold back the freshmen when they were rebelling. And yet, the show went on succesfully, just like what everyone hoped for. Come to think of it, I should've agreed when Bune advised me to stay at the sejarah's initiation.
Well, every good thing must come to an end, right? On the bright side, I have a ride home by sunday ;)
[Few messages for people]
Pedhe, Bune, Bangun, Syarif: Super duper thanks times thousands for taking me away in an unconventional saturday night. And thanks for the company and the ride home.
English 2oo2 class: I apologize for ditching you guys, but I'm not sorry.
Yos: I hate you, bitch, bitch, bitch! I know I'm not in the place to say this, but you are useless, even more than I am. I never saw you keeping your promises or even helping me with stuff up there!
[Picture Time!!]
one of the stupid pics we took
notice Pedhe's too-tight grip to my neck?
he couldn't keep still, but he still the cutest thing alive!
macannnn! ;)
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
stupid, happy and numb
Here it is...Fifth semester. So far so good, and I hope it'll stay that way. Here's a bit recap;
Let's talk about academic stuff, shall we? Because of one thing and another, I can't take Spanish this term. There goes my excitement for this semester out of the window. However I take French. Despite the hard-to-pronounce words and me keep forgetting what means what, I think it'll be a fun class. I haven't learned much yet. So far it's still about bonjour, commentallez-vous, and vous appelez-vous?. Yea, wait for more mind-boggling french words here, people. I also take Romantic and Gothic Lit class this term. It's an interesting class, but it's kinda ahead of my year. So I'm afraid I'll be like, the stupid donkey in this class. Yknow, the one who don't have anything to say bcos I haven't figured out just yet what this class is all about. Enough about classes, considering I can't find another exciting one to tell.
About life, lately
On monday I saw this guy I know. And for the next few hours, I kept thinking about him. Not that I like him or something. I just did. Ugh, I don't know, I can't explain it now bcos I cant even remember what I felt. Hahahah, sooo stupid. And for a while, I was afraid of the possibility of me liking this guy. Well, yea, there's always that possibility with me and any guy. I mean, no more liking the guy that I don't wanna like. I don't want any more "lupakan dong, itu kesalahan. knapa gua bisa suka dia dulu??" to my friends, and some sort. However, I don't need to worry about that anymore. I saw that guy again today, and I was like...what the hell was I thinking?? And no zsa zsa zsu whatsoever (not that I had zsa zsa zsu when I saw him on monday), no nothing. Okay, Run, no more coffee on the 1st day of school and right before seeing some familiar face (I'm a sucker for familiarity).
Moving on. Just when I thought I couldn't hate my campus more...Now it's overloaded with people. The number of freshmen is beyond massive. When they said "sea of people" I think they had my campus on their mind. Empty table in the caf is almost impossible, people are everywhere, standing in the way & crowding every space they can find, holy bananas, it SUCKS! So, on the lunchbreak today, Nandia had enough and asked us to go to another cafetaria with her. When I asked which one, she said Teknik. As always, there I was, torn between 'to go or 'not to'. But this time I didn't have any time to hesitate bcos Nandia, Imel and Tisam were already walking to Nand's car; so I followed them, still with no mind made up. Before I knew it, we already parked on FT's parking lot. Owkay, what do I have to lose, besides being in a place that I never feel comfy at, right?
Whoa, turned out, that caf was just as crowded as mine. We were lucky we found an empty table in the center section of the caf. We usually chose the back one, near the lake, but the tables were all taken. There I was, glancing to every direction, barely concentrating on what my friends were saying. But I didn't see him. That is, until Imel was back from the musholla and I had to slide slightly on my seat so that Imel could sit. That's when I glanced forward, and there he was. A nice, familiar face among the sea of irritating-looking strangers. He was metres away, but I could see him clearly. I couldn't get close to talk to him bcos his table was the one on the back. I had no reason to go there unless I was running some fashion show where I could walk back and forth without any clear point in doing so. That's okay tho...because as unusual as it was for me, I actually feel...content. It felt comfy this afternoon, gazing at him from that distance without any evil butterflies telling me nasty paranoia-inducing stuff. I'm glad :)
"And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you but I don't know how"
[oasis]
Let's talk about academic stuff, shall we? Because of one thing and another, I can't take Spanish this term. There goes my excitement for this semester out of the window. However I take French. Despite the hard-to-pronounce words and me keep forgetting what means what, I think it'll be a fun class. I haven't learned much yet. So far it's still about bonjour, commentallez-vous, and vous appelez-vous?. Yea, wait for more mind-boggling french words here, people. I also take Romantic and Gothic Lit class this term. It's an interesting class, but it's kinda ahead of my year. So I'm afraid I'll be like, the stupid donkey in this class. Yknow, the one who don't have anything to say bcos I haven't figured out just yet what this class is all about. Enough about classes, considering I can't find another exciting one to tell.
About life, lately
On monday I saw this guy I know. And for the next few hours, I kept thinking about him. Not that I like him or something. I just did. Ugh, I don't know, I can't explain it now bcos I cant even remember what I felt. Hahahah, sooo stupid. And for a while, I was afraid of the possibility of me liking this guy. Well, yea, there's always that possibility with me and any guy. I mean, no more liking the guy that I don't wanna like. I don't want any more "lupakan dong, itu kesalahan. knapa gua bisa suka dia dulu??" to my friends, and some sort. However, I don't need to worry about that anymore. I saw that guy again today, and I was like...what the hell was I thinking?? And no zsa zsa zsu whatsoever (not that I had zsa zsa zsu when I saw him on monday), no nothing. Okay, Run, no more coffee on the 1st day of school and right before seeing some familiar face (I'm a sucker for familiarity).
Moving on. Just when I thought I couldn't hate my campus more...Now it's overloaded with people. The number of freshmen is beyond massive. When they said "sea of people" I think they had my campus on their mind. Empty table in the caf is almost impossible, people are everywhere, standing in the way & crowding every space they can find, holy bananas, it SUCKS! So, on the lunchbreak today, Nandia had enough and asked us to go to another cafetaria with her. When I asked which one, she said Teknik. As always, there I was, torn between 'to go or 'not to'. But this time I didn't have any time to hesitate bcos Nandia, Imel and Tisam were already walking to Nand's car; so I followed them, still with no mind made up. Before I knew it, we already parked on FT's parking lot. Owkay, what do I have to lose, besides being in a place that I never feel comfy at, right?
Whoa, turned out, that caf was just as crowded as mine. We were lucky we found an empty table in the center section of the caf. We usually chose the back one, near the lake, but the tables were all taken. There I was, glancing to every direction, barely concentrating on what my friends were saying. But I didn't see him. That is, until Imel was back from the musholla and I had to slide slightly on my seat so that Imel could sit. That's when I glanced forward, and there he was. A nice, familiar face among the sea of irritating-looking strangers. He was metres away, but I could see him clearly. I couldn't get close to talk to him bcos his table was the one on the back. I had no reason to go there unless I was running some fashion show where I could walk back and forth without any clear point in doing so. That's okay tho...because as unusual as it was for me, I actually feel...content. It felt comfy this afternoon, gazing at him from that distance without any evil butterflies telling me nasty paranoia-inducing stuff. I'm glad :)
"And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you but I don't know how"
[oasis]
Sunday, September 05, 2004
"..we were sure we'd never see an end to it all.."
Another new layout. I hope Kopral won't ever come across this blog and recognize his own face behind the question mark. Heheh. This blog thingy is getting fun. Just yesterday I participated in making Ped's new layout. It turned out really great!
NEWSFLASH: School in 2 days, people! Blaaaah! Sucks! Dear people, my heart is in a great pain thinking this is the end of this holiday xP I just wish this is an easy semester. Like the third one. No? Okay...
Spent this last holiday night at Rosel's with Pedhe. Too bad Bune didn't come, she wasn't feeling very well and she refused to come home later than 10.00 pm. Yeaa, rrighht. Anyhoo, we were watching the Indonesian Idol final on TV and just laying around in mas Ramon's room. I like it, I always felt comfy everytime we had that--sort of--"girl's night in". Later on, Pedhe craved the delicious mussel gratin at Dixie; so, off we went. Again, too bad Rosel couldn't come. She has to wake up in about an hour from now. For what, people? For that ospek thingy. Makes me hate my uni more and more.
So there we were, just me & Pedhe, at Dixie, kemang. I don't know where the hell everyone was. Well, I know actually. Maria, Ebonk, Tesar, and some other people I know went to see a movie at Taman Ismail Marzuki. Maria asked us surely, but the meeting time was 05.00 pm. Of course we passed up. Angga had this premiere for Utopia at his house. Bangun...I think he's already in bandung now. Yea, point is, it was kinda quiet. However, there was Oho coming into Dixie. But he brought his girl friend, so I thought there'd be only a small chat with him and he'd sat on another table. Turned out, they were joining us. Oho is always a pleasant company, but a stranger? Awkward attack xP Well, you know the rest...Ho-hum.
That's about it for my saturday night. As soon as I got home, I had another late-night-narcissistic-picture-taking; haven't done that for a while. And now I'm back in front of my computer, bcos I don't want to get some sleep. I'm trying to--in a way--postpone the arrival of the end of this holiday. Yea, I know it's impossible. I don't want sunday to come. Again, I know it's here already.
That, however, brings me to another wondering of mine: What's with sunday? I mean, I hate it. I know some people who hate it. There's just this bad aura with sundays. It's like, I don't know, it's hard to explain. Sunday just screams jaded. Why is that, people? Anyone of you feel the same? Do you know why?
That's it from moi. Good night, people. And goodbye, holiday.
"take me back to the other place
take me back when im alone
i can see all the little things that once could make me whole"
[longwave]
NEWSFLASH: School in 2 days, people! Blaaaah! Sucks! Dear people, my heart is in a great pain thinking this is the end of this holiday xP I just wish this is an easy semester. Like the third one. No? Okay...
Spent this last holiday night at Rosel's with Pedhe. Too bad Bune didn't come, she wasn't feeling very well and she refused to come home later than 10.00 pm. Yeaa, rrighht. Anyhoo, we were watching the Indonesian Idol final on TV and just laying around in mas Ramon's room. I like it, I always felt comfy everytime we had that--sort of--"girl's night in". Later on, Pedhe craved the delicious mussel gratin at Dixie; so, off we went. Again, too bad Rosel couldn't come. She has to wake up in about an hour from now. For what, people? For that ospek thingy. Makes me hate my uni more and more.
So there we were, just me & Pedhe, at Dixie, kemang. I don't know where the hell everyone was. Well, I know actually. Maria, Ebonk, Tesar, and some other people I know went to see a movie at Taman Ismail Marzuki. Maria asked us surely, but the meeting time was 05.00 pm. Of course we passed up. Angga had this premiere for Utopia at his house. Bangun...I think he's already in bandung now. Yea, point is, it was kinda quiet. However, there was Oho coming into Dixie. But he brought his girl friend, so I thought there'd be only a small chat with him and he'd sat on another table. Turned out, they were joining us. Oho is always a pleasant company, but a stranger? Awkward attack xP Well, you know the rest...Ho-hum.
That's about it for my saturday night. As soon as I got home, I had another late-night-narcissistic-picture-taking; haven't done that for a while. And now I'm back in front of my computer, bcos I don't want to get some sleep. I'm trying to--in a way--postpone the arrival of the end of this holiday. Yea, I know it's impossible. I don't want sunday to come. Again, I know it's here already.
That, however, brings me to another wondering of mine: What's with sunday? I mean, I hate it. I know some people who hate it. There's just this bad aura with sundays. It's like, I don't know, it's hard to explain. Sunday just screams jaded. Why is that, people? Anyone of you feel the same? Do you know why?
That's it from moi. Good night, people. And goodbye, holiday.
"take me back to the other place
take me back when im alone
i can see all the little things that once could make me whole"
[longwave]
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