the highs would make you fly, and the lows make you want to die

I had my first period about 9 years ago, and still, the sight of blood dripping out of me always sends me to a certain nauseating dizziness and a near-passing-out experience. Not to mention since I got out of high school and stopped exercising weekly, I constantly have this gut-wrenching pain in my tummy everytime I have my so-called "little friend". URGH. Why do we females have to put up with this thing?

And I'd really like to destroy the belief that females have bad tantrums when they have their period. I managed to do that earlier today. Went to campus, got my Multiculturalism final paper (marked A-), saw my friends again, saw Mr.Bora the Sexplorer (haha, pardon the icky nick name), went to PIM a while... Everything was a-OK.

Then there was that phonecall I made to Ebonk. UGH. Long story made short: he won't come to Batu Karas. After his mockery prediction of me not going, which was so irritating, turns out he's the one who doesn't go. I was so afraid something might come up that could make me not go and make me become the butt of Ebonk's joke. I was really dreading about that. Now that I know for sure I'll go, now that I'm getting all psyched up about the trip, now that Rozelle and Ingga agree to come, he can't go! I'm not even sure I'm making a point here. But this really upsets me. Not to mention how he used "kapan gue mau lulus kalo gak SP?" reason. Wasn't he the one who made me rethink about graduating so soon so hard I almost lost my head? I know I'm definitely not making a point here, but, it's just that, I loathe how the things he said always got the best of me. Ugh.

Owell. He's still my best friend, and I can't blame him anyway.

ARGH! Darnitt!!

This must be the blood-dripping bitch talking.



*Taking a deep breath* You know what, never mind. My mood has just been lifted up again thanks to a newly-received testimonial from the mentioned Mr.Bora. Heheh. Ms.Goodmood is baaack.

fast as you can, baby, run! free yourself of me of me fast as you can

Pieces of lately:

About a week ago a blast from the past suddenly burst out of thin air and was being a "pain in the arse" (as I quoted him calling me). It was kinda funny, actually, how stupid he was. And maybe he didn't mean anything serious by all the SMS he sent me last week, but I just had to drive him away. I admit that. It's not like when I gave lollypop to my senior and unintentionally had him kicked out from the no-food-no-drink room. No, this time I deliberately made him run. I had an outburst. A drama queen's sulking to be exact, just because he said those "nasty words" (as I quoted from me). So he said he wouldn't bother me again. Teehee.

I hope this quirk of making-people-run-before-I-do-it-myself won't be a continuing bad habit for me.

On a far-better note: Roja went official with some guy. I don't know the guy yet, so personal review may come later on. Woo-hoo for that, but boo-hoo for my plan of rematchmaking her with another best friend. But still, happy for her.

About what I've been doing lately:
First, trying to compose application letter, just in case everything goes well. Amen. Second, been writing a story for a while until I met an absolut writer's block. Haven't wrote again since. Third, submitting as many answers (to why I'm Coldplay's biggest fan and how their music changed my life) as I can, just in case Lady Fortune loves me. Double amen. And lastly, for the last two days, I've been hooked on Text Twist--this geeky game for geeks like moi. Usually I gave up easily, and only managed to get 100000-ish score at the most. But right now, I have reached 772400 and still going, hopefully *geek mode: ON*

I should really get a job or something.

Long holiday is right in front of me and...woo-hoo!!! Aside from my dreadful waiting for GPA transcript, I'm finally able to kick back and relax. Who knows, maybe there won't be any long holiday again for me this time around next year... Maybe. Plans so far: Batu Karas with geng ngong and hopefully Rozelle *crossing fingers* next week and Bali I-don't-know-when with English dept 2002. I hope everything will be a big wee-hoo before I don't know what. Seriously.

"Sometimes my mind don't shake and shift
But most of the time, it does
And I get to the place where I'm begging for a lift
Or I'll drown in the wonders and the was"
[Fiona Apple]

we'll go, we'll go just where we want to. we won't let the others bleed us dry

I had my last exam for this semester yesterday, so now I can breathe and stop thinking for a while. In a few months I could be facing a new world of the so-called real life in front of me, or I could be vomiting from hearing and typing the words feminism, identity, multiculturalism, or naturalism all over again. Both are disturbing, but I'll still have to choose. I've thought and gone cuckoo about it, and I've decided that I won't think anymore of it for at least a week or two. I'm putting my mind in a hiatus.

Anyway. The best way to celebrate the unshackling of my brain? By going on a road trip with both my gengs. Yes, I went to Bandung yesterday with the genggong and the geng-ngong. See, Ingga invited me to come to this jazz event that he masterminded. I thought, why not. I asked the most aksi girls in the gang (ahem, B and R). Surprise, surprise, they actually agreed. Bune even sort of rescheduled her get-together with her friends. That's rare.

So, off we went in Bangun's Kijang. Me, Bune, Pedhe, Rozelle, Bangun, and Ebonk. When was the last time of that, I can't even remember. The trip was fun! I mean, with anybody else, it would be a literally pain-in-the-ass two hours ride. But I was with them and the stupid stuff (people-shuffling in the car in the middle of Bangun's speeding on the highway, formed a girlband and had an interview...), so it was all woo-hoo.

Let's say I won big on a jackpot machine for being with BunPedRozBangBonk at the same time, I won a bigger jackpot by seeing Ingga. A rendevouz with the long-missed Kacank and Ari didn't hurt either. Seriously, it was worth the jazz music my ears failed to comprehend. By the by, seeing one of my friends reuniting with her ex last night was aww-inducing. I couldn't help thinking that they belong together (I know, such a hallmark thing to say) nor could I help giving the evil eye to anyone who stood in the way. Heheh. Anywho, what's a night out without a karaoke session, right? So we visited Nav Plaza Dago or something and sang our asses off. Too bad Ingga, our #1 Batak artist, couldn't come.

Finally, at 3 am in the night... morning... wee hours... whatever, we all went home. Safe and sound. And very tired. I didn't want the night to end, it was like a gigantic fluffy pillow. Comfortable. But well, yeah, it did.

Well, that's about it for my feel-good report, until next time.

blah.

I feel like pulling a Chandler Bing right now.

Could this last week of college be any longer?

There. Now if I could only go mati suri until next week...