"I want to fall asleep. So I don't have to remember."

I understand your sentiment, Yuna, I really do. *bury self under the covers*

Sometimes you need a friend who just listens. Some other times one who smirks knowingly and subtly lays it down for you. And the rest of the times one who tells it like it really is. Luckily I have all three.

And maybe more.

He doesn't even have to think I'm the best person in the world. That kind of devotion is overrated.

Just hang out and sex. I'll live.

Sir, yes, Samantha Sir!

"This is all we need. A couple of smokes, a cup of coffee, and a little bit of conversation. You and me and five bucks." 

-Troy, Reality Bites.

Naive.

2013 has been made out of these:

- Jogja trip

- Getting promoted

- Gigs: John Legend, Snoop Dogg, BRMC, Flight Facilities, and of course, Blur

- Beaches: Balangan, Blue Lagoon at Padang Bai, Pandawa, Blue Point

- Break up

- First elephant ride

- Alcohol
- Newfound love for going dancing

- Secret rendezvous and trying new things

- Nusa Lembongan trip

- First snorkeling

- Tattoo

- And the same old, same old, depressing last day of the year

See you in 2014.

You know what, here's to curling up in bed, under the cover, all day, and not caring if you miss out on everything that occurs out there.

this miracle is of ecstatic fright

Been here for a year and seven months and five days. Been one hell of a roller coaster ride--with exciting loops and terrifying plunges.

And it's funny--I really mean funny--how things change in the last 584 days.


Here's to more free falling.
-R.

pine for higher ceilings and bourgeois happy feelings

Hi there. Dear blog. Should I introduce myself again? Should we start over?

It's been so long, I feel awkward (like I always do, actually).


Anyway. My (previous) Managing Editor has left his post to take another offer in Jakarta. Which got me automatically promoted. Thank you, thank you *bow while waiting for the applause to die down* No? Okay.

Somebody said those words when he congratulated me, "automatically promoted", which kind of dimmed my glittery 15 minutes of fame a bit. But what the hey, right? I feel like I'm going (hopefully) somewhere. Although I must admit that from the day the previous ME told me he was resigning until the day the guy from HR officially announced my promotion, I had been busy making a to-do list--or a to-dread list, to be more accurate.

- Look for ideas everywhere, all the time
- I have to know those who matter
- Those who matter have to know me
- Get to know the contributors
- Be nice to get what I want from them
- Be firm to get what I want from them

The list goes on and on, and all the points lead to this: I have to get out of my comfort zone. And it scared the bejesus out of me.

But then yesterday, I left the list for a bit to set up my emails, files, archives and whatnot on the new computer. I can't explain it, but dealing with my old computer is a hassle. It always has a way to not do what I need it to do. Seriously. Even certified IT guys and one Mac geek failed to do something as simple as moving old email archives to the new one. BUT. After picking my own Jello-like brain and some tweaking, I managed to do it. Insignificant triumph, I know, but I feel like if I can successfully do that without whining too much and losing my head in the process, then I can get whatever mess that comes my way neatly on track.

I think I can do this.



Can I get an amen?

what would liz lemon do?

I just realized that for any question you have in this life, you can always go to Liz Lemon--the woman who wanted to have it all, and who is finally having it all--for the answer. Here are some examples.

Question (Q): Who are the worst people?

Liz Lemon's Answer (LLA): Graduate students are the worst.

Q: What's the best comfort snack food or ice cream flavor?

LLA: Chocolate. Chocolate. Chocolate. Aaaaack!

Q: What is the best response when someone asks you to go to some gig of a band you never heard of at an abandoned loft or some ruined backyard with artsy names?

LLA: Nope, hipster nonsense. I'm out.

Q: How to get out of responsibilities?

LLA: I don't really think it's fair for me to be on a jury because I can read thoughts.

Q: Which party is the best party?

LLA: There ain't no party like a Liz Lemon party, 'cos a Liz Lemon party is mandatory.

And on to the subject of how to dance, I'll let these videos teach you how.

As a bonus, here's a tip from Cerie on the appropriate response when someone is being disrespectful to you.

Cerie: Did he just talk to me like I'm ugly?

Bye, 30 Rock :)

random musing #4

What if I'm a better editor than I am a writer? Does that make sense? And then I'll be spending my future editing some on-the-rise writers' to-be-best-selling books, while I'm stuck writing short, sad stories that go nowhere during my spare time :|

random musing #3

If I (ever) be as skinny as I was in high school, I probably will sport a pixie cut.



...unless there's an important wedding coming up, and I have to wear kebaya.

Gema flew back to Jakarta this morning. Hello, empty room.

how come it's just around the bend?

Last day of 2012.

This December has been fun. Nilam and Arris were here last week. And Gema is still here. I wish they all could stay as long as I'm here. Sindro is in the capital right now. I wish I could go to the capital right now. Ped has gone back to Balikpapan. I wish I could gather them all in one place and just stay there. Among the familiar ones.

December 31 has always been emotional for me, and I can't pinpoint exactly why. Butterflies are restless. But anyway, here's to tomorrow that even Mayans couldn't predict, and to the next time I see you all again :)

exactly!

random musing #2

A friend once said that I like to point out the bad in people. That, or something in the line of that. Well in my opinion,

1. Somebody needs to point out the bad in people, just so they know when they're being mind-numbingly maudlin or anything else that's worth criticizing.
2. Believe it or not, I filter myself. The censorship council in this head is still working. And believe you me when I say, not only can I find a bad trait in everyone, I can make a long list of bad traits in each of that everyone... if I want to.

And,

Fuck it. You, you can't make up your mind to save your life. You, you are forever in denial and not fooling anyone. You, you pretend to listen when actually, you're playing with your phone. You, you're the biggest nyinyir mouth I've ever met. And the list goes on and on.

Now, point out the bad in me, and see if I haven't heard it before.

random musing #1

I think I'm in the age group where the inhabitants are too old to start making friends that will amount to anything more than fair-weather acquaintances. 

That's okay. The feeling's mutual and besides, I've secured a pack of the unconditional ones.

it's a long road to wisdom, but it's a short one to being ignored

The perks of living alone:

- I don't have to tidy up when I don't feel like it. Although most of the time I can be more anal than Monica Geller.

- All the crying--from watching sad movies or crappy TV series, or from stupid arguments with boyfriend, or when I just feel like to--I can do without anyone here to judge me. Or pull a Tommy Page and give a shoulder to cry on, for that matter. So I lose some too.

- I can walk around this 3.5x4.5 casa indecently-clothed.


Life's good.

a crumb of comfort cookie

"Shit, I'm a nutcase, aren't I?" she said, while wiping the drying tears on her face. It was one of the melodramatic episodes on one of their many date nights.

"Pretty much, yeah," he shrugged.

"Do you think this will get worse? My demons?"

"Yeah, I'm afraid so."

She let out a little genuine laugh, but at the same time she was afraid. It seemed far fetched--and she had been using these "demons" as an excuse for a while now--but what if she really was out of her mind, and what if she wasn't getting any better?

"So what are you going to do about it?" she asked, hoping to lighten the mood. They could think about serious matters on another day.

"We can get a doctor or something to help me help you."

"Will you wait for me while they're putting me through therapies or whatever experiments that they do to nutcases?"

"Definitely. I'm not going anywhere."

i'd buy you rogaine when you start losing all your hair

Earlier this year, I went crazy when Christopher Plummer won Oscar for Best Supporting Actor and I heard his acceptance speech. I always go crazy over elderly love, and the one Plummer has for his wife is a tearjerker. This is the end part of his speech:

"...And lastly, my long-suffering wife, Elaine, who deserves the noble peace prize for coming to my rescue everyday of my life."

Watch this (5.15), and tell me you're not holding back tears, I dare you.

Well anyway, I have just come across his acceptance speech when he won Golden Globe for the same category, also this year. And this is his how Plummer saluted his wife:

"...And lastly, a fair lady called Elaine, my wife of 43 years, whose bravery and beauty haunts me still."

Can I get an aww aww? 

What? You're not crying yet? Here, have some Sherman Pore from 2007 American Idol audition.

Or this best wordless poignancy ever:

Of course there's the--not as tearjerking, but touching--grumpy old couple from New York, I Love You and many more. I could make a book from compiling all the sweet elderly romances. I guess what I'm saying is, let's love and grow old together.